Photo: Christine Donnier-Valentin
Your love has always been a tornado
and my heart a trailer park in it's path.
Its an arduous journey going down,
like straight whiskey with no glass.
Somehow I keep holding on
like a careless scarf caught on barbed wire.
I am waiting to be rescued from the smoke
but you are running from the fire.
Yet, somehow through the wreckage,
I still have something left to hold you close to me.
My heart has a sofa in the middle of nowhere
waiting for your love to take a seat.
Yes, my heart has always been a trailer park,
and your love a tornado on it's way.
It is an arduous journey going down,
like a plate of eaten jalapenos the following day.
Whew, Carrie, nicethemes throughout - the trailer park, tornados, jalepenos, whiskey - I could feel theburn and sense the destruction.
ReplyDeletelove can leave destruction, thats for sure....LOVE this write :)
ReplyDeleteI love the tornado imagery -- very powerful.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful, Carrie. So good to see you writing more regularly again.
ReplyDeleteI love the notion of love as a tornado...
ReplyDeleteI love that you can take a bunch of redneck and make it beautiful.
ReplyDeleteGreat new look to your blog, too!
like a "straight whiskey with no glass" - hit me again! Having lived a trailer park love, I know of tornados, jalapenos, wreckage and softness of sofas. You captured it all, nicely written.
ReplyDeleteGreat metaphor, Carrie!
ReplyDeletevery cool carrie...you def give us a great picture of what it is like without telling, or in using your metaphors...very nice piece..
ReplyDeleteVery nice. I particularly liked "My heart has a sofa in the middle of nowhere
ReplyDeletewaiting for your love to take a seat."
These analogies, references, metaphors -- quite remarkable...
ReplyDeleteFabulous write, I am with Martin, I like the words 'my heart has a sofa in the middle of nowhere waiting for your love to take a seat.'
ReplyDeleteI simply could not believe how each two line stanza stands on its own .. amazing!
ReplyDeleteWow, that was a lot of metaphor and simile. :)
ReplyDeleteI liked the jalapenos at the end. Too funny.
Oh...great! I can hear this as a song...of course c/w since you mentioned 'trailer park' lol. Seriously though, good one Carrie.
ReplyDeleteThat's great! I, too, liked the jalapenos line at the end.
ReplyDeleteYour love has always been a tornado and my heart a trailer park in its path...love that..great poem!
ReplyDeleteMy heart has a sofa in the middle of nowhere
ReplyDeletewaiting for your love to take a seat.
Aaaahhh! ♥
I could sing and dance to this one...what a knockout!!
ReplyDeleteEvery stanza is an emotional punch. Just an excellent poem!
ReplyDeleteRick
Carrie, it's a very good poem. The first two lines are so good that your repetition of them near the end is strong, not dull.
ReplyDeleteGreat metaphor to open your poem
ReplyDeleteFabulous! I was really drawn in by the 'runaway' nature of your poem. Love it. penny
ReplyDeleteSomehow a tornado is always a pending doom: the
ReplyDeletemobile and immobile; great analogy and so true.
I really like this flow, thanks!
Love on fire! Nice Jalapeno poetry..
ReplyDeleteVery nice Carey - a trailer park and a tornado...not a good combination for love...hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving..bkm
ReplyDeleteCarrie, this is stunning. Fabulous take.
ReplyDeleteGreat metaphors, and you work them well. I like the stanza "My heart has a sofa in the middle of nowhere..." Wonderful Magpie; thank you!
ReplyDeleteLovely poem, Carrie, with wonderful imagery!
ReplyDeleteI love your take on this! Beautiful!
ReplyDeleteYou just know that this couch *knows* things........ ;)
ReplyDeleteExcellent stuff!
ReplyDeleteAnna :o]
Great poem Carrie and it offers so much to think about. Maybe the sofa is a bit uncomfortable. Do you need to replace the cushions? It might be impossible to get out of the path of the tornado but perhaps it can be tamed?
ReplyDeletegreat metaphors and imagery
ReplyDelete