Sunday, November 27, 2011

Tornadoes And Trailer Parks

Photo: Christine Donnier-Valentin


Magpie # 93

Your love has always been a tornado
and my heart a trailer park in it's path.

Its an arduous journey going down,
like straight whiskey with no glass.

Somehow I keep holding on
like a careless scarf caught on barbed wire.

I am waiting to be rescued from the smoke
but you are running from the fire.

Yet, somehow through the wreckage,
I still have something left to hold you close to me.

My heart has a sofa in the middle of nowhere
waiting for your love to take a seat.

Yes, my heart has always been a trailer park,
and your love a tornado on it's way.

It is an arduous journey going down,
like a plate of eaten jalapenos the following day.
at
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34 comments:

  1. SheilaNovember 27, 2011 at 2:56 PM

    Whew, Carrie, nicethemes throughout - the trailer park, tornados, jalepenos, whiskey - I could feel theburn and sense the destruction.

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  2. AnonymousNovember 27, 2011 at 3:35 PM

    love can leave destruction, thats for sure....LOVE this write :)

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  3. Elizabeth MahlouNovember 27, 2011 at 4:15 PM

    I love the tornado imagery -- very powerful.

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  4. MaryNovember 27, 2011 at 4:38 PM

    Beautiful, Carrie. So good to see you writing more regularly again.

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  5. Tess KincaidNovember 27, 2011 at 8:00 PM

    I love the notion of love as a tornado...

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  6. Brandee ShaferNovember 27, 2011 at 9:39 PM

    I love that you can take a bunch of redneck and make it beautiful.

    Great new look to your blog, too!

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  7. The UnknowngnomeNovember 27, 2011 at 10:12 PM

    like a "straight whiskey with no glass" - hit me again! Having lived a trailer park love, I know of tornados, jalapenos, wreckage and softness of sofas. You captured it all, nicely written.

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  8. Laurie KolpNovember 28, 2011 at 6:42 AM

    Great metaphor, Carrie!

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  9. Brian MillerNovember 28, 2011 at 8:16 AM

    very cool carrie...you def give us a great picture of what it is like without telling, or in using your metaphors...very nice piece..

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  10. MartinNovember 28, 2011 at 10:33 AM

    Very nice. I particularly liked "My heart has a sofa in the middle of nowhere
    waiting for your love to take a seat."

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  11. BerowneNovember 28, 2011 at 10:48 AM

    These analogies, references, metaphors -- quite remarkable...

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  12. Marilyn & JeffNovember 28, 2011 at 11:41 AM

    Fabulous write, I am with Martin, I like the words 'my heart has a sofa in the middle of nowhere waiting for your love to take a seat.'

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  13. HelenNovember 28, 2011 at 12:20 PM

    I simply could not believe how each two line stanza stands on its own .. amazing!

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  14. ✿November 28, 2011 at 12:54 PM

    Wow, that was a lot of metaphor and simile. :)

    I liked the jalapenos at the end. Too funny.

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  15. Other MaryNovember 28, 2011 at 1:17 PM

    Oh...great! I can hear this as a song...of course c/w since you mentioned 'trailer park' lol. Seriously though, good one Carrie.

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  16. CatalystNovember 28, 2011 at 1:34 PM

    That's great! I, too, liked the jalapenos line at the end.

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  17. Susie ClevengerNovember 28, 2011 at 2:34 PM

    Your love has always been a tornado and my heart a trailer park in its path...love that..great poem!

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  18. JinksyNovember 28, 2011 at 3:41 PM

    My heart has a sofa in the middle of nowhere
    waiting for your love to take a seat.

    Aaaahhh! ♥

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  19. LynNovember 28, 2011 at 5:13 PM

    I could sing and dance to this one...what a knockout!!

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  20. R. Burnett BakerNovember 28, 2011 at 6:00 PM

    Every stanza is an emotional punch. Just an excellent poem!

    Rick

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  21. Jim SwindleNovember 28, 2011 at 6:55 PM

    Carrie, it's a very good poem. The first two lines are so good that your repetition of them near the end is strong, not dull.

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  22. TrellissimoNovember 28, 2011 at 11:11 PM

    Great metaphor to open your poem

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  23. Heavens2BetsyNovember 29, 2011 at 2:59 AM

    Fabulous! I was really drawn in by the 'runaway' nature of your poem. Love it. penny

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  24. izzyNovember 29, 2011 at 5:44 AM

    Somehow a tornado is always a pending doom: the
    mobile and immobile; great analogy and so true.
    I really like this flow, thanks!

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  25. indiwriterNovember 29, 2011 at 7:56 AM

    Love on fire! Nice Jalapeno poetry..

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  26. signed...bkmNovember 29, 2011 at 11:47 AM

    Very nice Carey - a trailer park and a tornado...not a good combination for love...hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving..bkm

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  27. MaggieNovember 29, 2011 at 4:52 PM

    Carrie, this is stunning. Fabulous take.

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  28. dsNovember 29, 2011 at 8:41 PM

    Great metaphors, and you work them well. I like the stanza "My heart has a sofa in the middle of nowhere..." Wonderful Magpie; thank you!

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  29. IntelliblogNovember 29, 2011 at 11:09 PM

    Lovely poem, Carrie, with wonderful imagery!

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  30. Redefining NormalNovember 30, 2011 at 11:58 AM

    I love your take on this! Beautiful!

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  31. Mimi FoxmortonDecember 1, 2011 at 6:23 AM

    You just know that this couch *knows* things........ ;)

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  32. hyperCRYPTICalDecember 1, 2011 at 6:41 AM

    Excellent stuff!

    Anna :o]

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  33. Stafford RayDecember 1, 2011 at 12:31 PM

    Great poem Carrie and it offers so much to think about. Maybe the sofa is a bit uncomfortable. Do you need to replace the cushions? It might be impossible to get out of the path of the tornado but perhaps it can be tamed?

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  34. AnonymousDecember 3, 2011 at 11:25 AM

    great metaphors and imagery

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"Our best thoughts come from others." ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

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