Tuesday, June 26, 2018

Paper Cuts and Land Slides

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Linking with Imaginary Gardens for the Tuesday Platform brought to us by the lovely Magaly also linking with Poets United for the Mid Week Motif ~ When I think about Myself brought to us by the lovely Sumana and lastly linking with The Sunday Muse
come join us!


"Many of our fears are tissue-paper thin, and a single courageous step would carry us through."
~Brendan Francis



I never could walk in the rain with the ease of a star or runway model
I am not that girl
the one that takes the dangerous path
barefoot in the middle of nowhere
unconcerned with what may come
I am the lady that arrives early
to the Dr.'s office
on the verge of sickness
with an umbrella
not because it is raining
but because it could
 when I leave the building
my bag is full of every document
known to man I could need
and my mind is even fuller
with the thought of
driving back in the rain
control is a small beady eyed old man
and no one knows his name
or where he was last
I have been trying to track him down
ever since grade school
I tried Marco Polo
but he was never listening
the only thing I have had control over
is my bladder
until about 2016
now it seems I could just throw caution to the wind
since not much remains in my hands anyway
jewel thief's have ransacked my marble collection
it seems i never had them contained from the beginning
life is full of paper cuts and land slides
and somewhere between band aids and mud boots
I lost sight of the difference between the two
uncertainty is a scary thing 
especially when you are young
if you learn to fear and dread early
all perspective can get distorted
like the view through the wrong prescription glasses
all objects get blurry
everything becomes scary and uncertain
I am learning to change what I see
but this has proved to be a slow process
like road repair done by old nuns
still I try to make control my own ordained ministry
even though I am no minister
with time I have found
it is not what one acquires
that makes it clear
but more what one
learns in the process
of letting it go.



23 comments:

  1. Oh my goodness, this is a poem I could have written............I love every line and especially the closing ones. Brilliant and wise and so well said.

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  2. I'm very glad she's not the girl from lines 3-4, that is madness (and stupidity, too). The rain is a wonder, but having an umbrella at hand might free a body from future sufferings.

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  3. life is full of paper cuts and land slides
    and somewhere between band aids and mud boots
    I lost sight of the difference between the two.... fantastic lines.. resonate deeply... so recognize them!!!

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  4. We are sometimes so fearful and just wonder with unease.

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  5. Ha ha....When I was young I was adventurous and it is only by the grace of God that I was spared any significant disasters. Now I am exactly like you...have all the documents, snake bite kit, bandages ,torch,water, everything in the giant handbag...The other day at the doctor's surgery the doctor ( one of the last living gentlemen) offered to take my bag,,,he almost dropped it because it was so heavy:)

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  6. "life is full of paper cuts and land slides".. this is so powerful and true!

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  7. control is a small beady eyed old man
    and no one knows his name
    or where he was last...

    That is an excellent analogy, Carrie.

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  8. So true, what you say about learning 'to fear and dread early'--it does skew a person's perspective for the rest of his/her life. Thank you for writing an honest, necessary poem.

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  9. I think you and I took a different approach to the same phenomenon--I called it worry, and you call it caution, I think, or "what could be" like "Paper cuts and landslides." I totally enjoy your perspective, and hope in my case acceptance will lead to "letting it go." I love the beady-eyed old man, that the narrator tried Marco Polo, the wrong prescription glasses and the road repair done by old nuns! Such a fine sense of humor tempers what you see, looking at self,

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  10. Ah yes a spirit of adventure helps to toughen even the toughest
    "I tried Marco Polo
    but he was never listening"

    Loved every line. Carrie. Happy Wednesday. Thanks for dropping by my blog today

    much love...

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  11. Ain't that the truth, girl? Love it.

    I finally got inspired myself, too.

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  12. Control... something that can be a curse, but also saves us... love these lines:

    life is full of paper cuts and land slides
    and somewhere between band aids and mud boots
    I lost sight of the difference between the two

    Maybe we should limit control to the mud-slides

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  13. oh, Carrie...this is amazing! As a control freak I relate to much of this (except for the letting go part...). Inspiring!

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  14. ..I was enchanted with the "paper cuts and landslides, band aids and mud boots" and the "road repair by old nuns". Your descriptive phrases are delicious. Great read!

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  15. A lot of are like thst, Carrie. Me too, sort of. I call it "engineer's personality." I even straighten pictures in persons' homes who I barely know. Sometimes I ask, most times I don't. I claim "control is a small beady eyed old man and no one knows his nameor where he was last."
    ..

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  16. What a delight to read a monologue like this with the feeling we are actually hearing you speak. Most of us hide our uncertainty and this can be unnoticed but your confession is a delight to read and something we all should do and having done so all our conceived faults would disappear with shame!

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  17. I love the conclusion in the end and many great images like "control is a small beady eyed old man" and "life is full of paper cuts and land slides" I had to let go of control long time ago because of learning disabilities I had no control over my body and lol I had a profound word finding problem lol (thanks for thesauruses) It was swimming like that or sinking.

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  18. still I try to make control my own ordained ministry
    even though I am no minister

    now, that is something to ponder, perhaps healing, hope and strength can be found in this ministry

    There were many lines that just stopped me in my tracks to ponder...

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  19. OMG...This poem is an absolute delight Carrie. A cautious spirit is what we need at all ages to work magic for this one life, god willing. The most amusing part was the image of the "small beady eyed old man". The poem has such spontaneity.

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  20. Thank you so much for taking the time to share such a nice information.

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  21. "but this has proved to be a slow process
    like road repair done by old nuns"

    Slow, but still moving ahead...

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  22. how wonderfully written....somehow i feel kind of related to this speaker...!!

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  23. I think that all women are connected, all facets of each other, linked together by the universe. The proof is in your poem, Carrie, and the comments made by the female readers (Sorry Bjorn, Jim and Robin!). I too see bits of myself in this poem, especially:
    'I never could walk in the rain with the ease of a star or runway model'
    and
    'I am the lady that arrives early
    to the Dr.'s office
    on the verge of sickness
    with an umbrella
    not because it is raining
    but because it could
    ...
    and my mind is even fuller
    with the thought of
    driving back in the rain'
    and
    'the only thing I have had control over
    is my bladder
    until about 2016
    now it seems I could just throw caution to the wind'!
    And I so agree that:
    'if you learn to fear and dread early
    all perspective can get distorted
    like the view through the wrong prescription glasses
    all objects get blurry'.

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"Our best thoughts come from others." ~Ralph Waldo Emerson